Para Español, Oprima 2!


…And THAT’s the extent of my Spanish! ZOP!

Hola, amigos! I’m in Nicaragua, the land of volcanoes and churches and “temperate forests” (aka JUNGLES WOOO) and coconuts and cacao and AMAZING fruit and Waslala and Matagalpa and Managua and León and wait, where am I again?!

My cousin John! And me! Ironically, a lot of our family call him Juan, while his Nicaraguan friends all call him John. Or Johncito, which means little John, which he clearly is. Duh. Anyway, he lives and works in Waslala, Nicaragua. He is an electrical engineer. He is great.

Nicaragua is one of the most beautiful countries I’ve ever seen, and we saw plenty of it on the drive from Managua to Waslala! We rattled around like beans in a maraca from Matagalpa onward in our trusty little 4-wheel drive. Woo, dirt/mud/rock roads! It was like a roller coaster, only more life-threatening!

Kiddinnnnggggggg, Juan’s a great driver. And we’re having a BLAST!

These are the family fart machines I’m traveling with: Aunt Mary, a.k.a. Tía Maria, a.k.a. Sharon; my older brother Patrick, a.k.a. Patricio, a.k.a. Furniture; and cousin John, a.k.a. Juan, a.k.a. Johncito, a.k.a. Jambalaya, a.k.a. Juan Beyah en fuego, etc, etc.

I have tales of the jungle, of cipro and fruit juice and GIANT BUGS and HUNDREDS of pictures for you, but don’t feel like typing all that nonsense right now. So for now, here’s a picture of us swimming in our undies by a great big waterfall!


So, friends, I am: not dead yet, only resting, having a blast, drinking vodka (the perks of traveling with the SHARONATOR!), speaking terrible Spanish, alternately bickering and laughing with my older brother, laughing at farts, taking Cipro, meeting people, taking pictures, learning tons, helping out at schools, attending health workshops for rural community leaders, hanging out with mah cuz and aunt and brosky, eating yummy Nicaraguan food, and listening to the wedding party next door.

Oh, I’m in León. I was in Waslala.

Gonna go poop and shower now.



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